on a roll!

I am finishing projects all over the place! Yesterday, I finally cast off the second of a second pair of Bears colored legwarmers. I made some for a friend awhile back and did the stripes incorrectly. I still gave them too her, but wanted to do a second pair. I made these a little wider so they would fit me well. This is the first thing I have ever knit for myself, other than a 20 minute headband.

I finished them up yesterday morning on my commute and in class.....just in time for the freezing commute home in 19 degree weather. Ouch. My calves were toasty. Sadly, they don't stay up well over my knees, so I may sew in some elastic in the top ribbing to help them get some grip.

I am now plotting my next knitting move. I don't want to divulge too much on here, since I plan to knit for Christmas gifts. I am feeling a little low since I am pretty much done with all of my projects. I still have to piece together my cousin's afghan. I am planning on working on that today and this weekend.

turning a new tea leaf

After eating too much over Thanksgiving (though less than in past years) and subsequently seeing some recent photographs of myself, I have decided it is time to finally buckle down and commit to some serious weight loss. I would like to lose about 75 pounds over the next year. I ordered an exercise video (I am too embarrassed to tell you what it is) and am going to stop the fast food lunches. However, the biggest challenge is to stop drinking white mochas at Starbucks. Even though I get them with skim milk and no whip, they are still chock full of sugar! So, I am trying to make some significant behavioral changes and am going to move to drinking black tea, with a little skim milk and splenda every morning instead. This is day one.....I went to Argo Tea instead of Starbucks, just to make it easier.

My goal is not to calorie count or get obsessive, but to make some significant changes in my diet choices. I am a creature of habit, so the daily mochas and Thursday afternoon Ben and Jerry's will be hard to break. It's like smoking for me. It wasn't the addiction, it was the habit.

I am ready....I will do this!

Your Score: The Rabbit Spirit

You scored 67% Creativity, 72% Compassion, 41% Strength, and 54% Intelligence!

You are a Rabbit Spirit. You are very sweet and kind, and can be creative. You are sometimes nervous and shy, and are very alert as to what's going around you. You have a couple good friends, and love frolicking in the meadows.

bullet the blue sky

The Joshua Tree is being re-released. It's been 20 years. It has been a staple in my rotation for all of those years. Every few years I re-discover it and get new meaning out of it. I plan on picking up the new remastered edition - but I have already been revisiting it pretty frequently in recent weeks. This video is from Rattle and Hum - but it counts right? After all, it is the Joshua Tree tour. This song has always been a favorite, but has really gained a lot more significance for me recently.

Enjoy.

all finished!

Today, I completed two projects...

1. While I was on the way to Kansas, I was able to knit in the car. This was a miracle! So, I was able to finish the pair of legwarmers for Sarah! I tucked in the yarn ends this evening and will be giving them to her tomorrow!

2. I finished my big research paper on Feminist Psychological Theory and Therapy. I read way more than necessary in preparation, but better that than not enough. I am relieved it is finally finished. It has been hanging over my head all semester.

In addition to this news - I finally was given an invitation to join ravelry.com which is a fabulous online knitting community. I found a fantastic MST3K pattern and plan to make a hat or a bag with it. I am not sure yet. It is intarsia, not fair isle, so I am unsure of my abiity to perform. Ugh.

I am glad to be home from Kansas. I think Graham is the only human being I can be around non-stop for days and not tire of. Other people? Not so much. It was nice to have a day to myself today. Tomorrow, back to the grind at school....next week is the last week. Now that the big paper is finished, I only have a couple smaller writing projects and a presentation to do.

Break will be here soon - but that only means I will be prepping for my 3rd MA exam....crikey. I will be sure to set aside SOME knitting time!

finding your narrative

The other day in my methods class we were talking about narrative therapy. I found it interesting to think about the stories and films I am drawn to and why I am connected to them. Here's the trailer from my all time favorite. So, what does it mean? ;)

What themes are prevalent in your favorite stories? What does it say about you, your life, your personality, your dreams, your fears? It is fun to explore!

i can't wait to see this

the way of the cross

As I have been reflecting upon my time in Georgia, it has been next to impossible to lay claim to words that describe, explain and explore what happened there. I am not a good writer and I am sad that I cannot convey the experience well with words. Here is an attempt to do what feels like the impossible. I am not able to do justice to what it is like to stand before power in the light of God's abundant grace. Much love to those who journeyed with me.
____

We approach the barbed wire fences, as the names of the dead ring out under gray skies. Tears sting my eyes as I struggle for forward momentum. Sobbing. I bury my eyes in the comfort of another’s shoulder. Clutching arms, our feet find their way, for we follow the way of the cross.

Here - before the gates, before the School of the Americas, before the home of our nation’s complicity in gruesome atrocities, before a system of death and destruction carried out in our names - we follow the way of the cross.

We claim the power of naming - naming of the dead: babies, children, brothers, sisters, fathers and mothers, grandmothers and grandfathers - each one with a story, a name, a story. All are named, though only God names some, for their bodies could not be identified. They are all here. Presenté. White crosses raised in victory over death. Lives lost and grieved. We pay respect. We follow the way of the cross.

We denounce torture. We decry murder. We turn our backs on rape. Not in our names. We follow the way of the cross.

The police took our crosses from us. It was said they could be weapons. We were forced to leave them behind. They can take our crosses away from us, but they cannot take us from the cross. We refuse to be defeated by their attempts at demoralization. We have no weapons; we have come in peace. We follow the way of the cross.

I feel small at the feet of the gate, but stand strong before this power and humble before God. May our tears water the earth and bring forth fruits of love, justice, forgiveness and reconciliation.

Christ is here.
We follow the way of the cross.

network of spiritual progressives/tikkun

Network of Spiritual Progressives

Tikkun Magazine

At the SOA weekend, I had the pleasure to see Rabbi Michael Lerner speak about his vision of the Global Marshall Plan and his theology in action of the "left hand of God" (also the name of his book). I highly recommend looking into the organization, his book and Tikkun Magazine. I was deeply moved by his passion and vision.

CLICK HERE

SOA Protest/Vigil 2007

There is so much to say though difficult to find the words to use. The eight of us made it to Ft. Benning, GA and back in less then 3 days. Over the 2,000 miles of driving and intense sleep deprivation we managed to keep ourselves centered and focused.

I plan on doing some writing on the trip soon. I am still decompressing and working through all of the experiences in my mind. The weekend held many spiritual and profound moments.

I left not knowing any of the people I traveled with. I returned feeling a great deal of love and connection with them. It was difficult to be the one new person, as they are all already friends. They are in the MASJ program at Loyola/IPS while I am MAPC.....so, it was a little tense for me at first. However, I managed to jump in pretty quickly.

I hope to have some writing done soon. I also have to jump back into papers and reading for school. I had decided to press on with the trip to Kansas this week, and juggle the big term paper - but it looks as if though I will be staying behind anyway, seeing as Graham was not able to find anyone to watch the animals. Everyone I know lives far away or won't be in town. So, I hope to use that time to read and write. I am not sure how much I will get done today. This past weekend calls for some significant, deep reflection.

Photos from the trip

words cannot explain

how tired I am right now. I still have baking, laundry and packing to do. I am headed to GA in the morning with the IPS/Loyola crew. I will be sans email/computer access until Monday. So, have a great weekend friends!

http://www.soaw.org

a depeche find!

I thought I had seen it all. Back in the late 80's I was a Depeche Mode junkie. Long before the days of filesharing, youtube or even compact discs, it was a challenge to get your hands on everything your favorite band did. In Junior High Depeche Mode was IT for me.....I listened to other things, but as some can attest when I had a favorite - it was eat, sleep, breathe that favorite. I collected DM 12" singles with every mega mix, super mix, crazy mix (yadda yadda yadda) that one could imagine!! It was like an ongoing scavenger hunt for the next nugget. There was no internet back then, you couldn't just order that one you couldn't find from Germany or find it on eBay. You just had to dig through record store bins every few weeks and see what you could find. That was so much fun! I would fill most weekends with babysitting gigs to make money to buy more records.

In 8th grade, I had this collection of Depeche Mode videos that I rented from the mom and pop video store. I copied it with our double VCR hook up and watched it until it died. It had years worth of videos - but it didn't have this one!! I mean, if you watch it, you might think, "well it's pretty silly!" But all the rest of their videos were pretty silly too. I mean, crikey, People or People was filmed on a Naval vessel! huh? So, I am not entirely sure why it didn't make the cut on the video. But, I am pretty floored to find it now. I used to love this song! (warning: it is SO dated now)

Best part? The video makes me giggle.

good news

I got a call from the doctor today and the good news is that all of my tests came back normal. So, this is quite a relief! I still would like to know why I have persistent pelvic pain and discomfort, and will be calling the doctor to discuss further possibilities. But, I am so relieved that we have ruled out tumors and/or cancer.

In more good news....Graham was offered a permanent position at his job (no more temping!) with a promotion and a raise! This is fantastic news! This new position comes with a lot more stress and responsibility. So, he is a little unsure about it all. But, I know he will do well!

I got an extension on my research paper that is due on Tuesday, since I am going to the SOA weekend this week. However, I am panicking big time as I have a lot to read and a lot to write. Thankfully, I have gotten most of my other big projects out of the way and I can now focus in on this. It looks like I will have to spend a chunk of my Thanksgiving holiday in the books. I have considered not going on the trip to Kansas, but am not sure if that's the right decision. I have to admit that 6 straight days of nothing but time to read and write is very appealing. However, spending Thanksgiving at home with Em? We might get kind of cranky. So, we'll see.

Sarah tried on the first of the legwarmers today and it fit like a glove! I am so happy she likes is. I just adore her! :) I can't wait to get the second one done - but I will not likely have much time to work on it until after the big paper. It is too intricate to do in the car - I will get sick.

Yeah, I have piles of books to read and loads of knitting to do....I have two car trips coming up. One week I will be doing 12-13 hours each way and the next week 11-12 hours each way and I can't do anything in a car. This is a travesty. ;)

the health update

is that there isn't much of an update. I went in for an ultrasound today. The tech said that this doctor likes to follow up with her patients personally and I should expect a call later this week. When I have the info, so will you. Thank you to everyone who has been keeping me in their thoughts and prayers. The not knowing is a difficult part.

Peace.

sam cooke

Sam Cooke is one of my all time favorites.There are really no words for how I feel about him. To say I adore Sam Cooke is a massive understatement. He is so handsome, and his voice makes my insides wiggle.

Here is a clip of him covering the Dylan classic "Blowin' in the Wind". Enjoy!

almost finished

I have so much work to do for school, it's unreal.....and while I have gotten a few things done this weekend, I have been engrossed in this knitting project. This is the first of the pair - and all the fair isle work is now finished. I just need to do the cuff on the end, and that's that! I was just in awe watching this come together, I couldn't stop! I will not start on the second one until later in the week. I need to buckle down with a lot of reading and writing.....but, I wanted to share the joy.

fair isle

This is my first attempt at fair isle knitting. It was a bit difficult at first, but now I am really savoring the technique. There are a few things I will try differently on my second legwarmer of the set. I didn't carry the green properly for awhile so it peeks through a bit - but it doesn't bother me enough to go back and fix it. I will just do it differently next time.

I am really proud of myself for finally tackling this skill - I have been scared off by it for some time. I am addicted.

like a dark truck stop at 3am

This is such an atmospheric song.

By and far my favorite by Neko Case.

can you tell it's friday?

I always have trouble getting work done on Fridays. I am usually pretty beat from the week. So, I usually spend the day procrastinating....doing things like updating my blog, posting on internet forums and whatnot.

So, here is a photo of the pile of completed panels for the afghan. I will be putting it together soon!

mr. rogers goes to washington

In 1969, the US Senate had a hearing on funding the proposed Corporation for Public Broadcasting, but President Nixon wanted it cut in half for the Vietnam War.

This is worth watching in full.

In addition, do yourself a favor and read this fabulous article.

15 Reasons Mr. Rogers was the Best Neighbor Ever

This is one of my favorite articles I have read in recent weeks. I love Mr. Rogers.

your weekly youtube installment

It's hard to believe I first heard the Buena Vista Social Club for the first time almost ten years ago. Their wild success brought the sounds of Cuban Son into the lives and homes of people around the world. I was no different. I have to say that it also changed my life. I had always been fascinated by Cuba, but once I started listening to them - and other Cuban music - I was hooked.

When I graduated with my BFA in Photography in 2002, my mom gave me the graduation gift of a trip to Cuba with a group from a local university. I went with the desire to learn about the nation and photograph this exquisite place. I came back with a deep love for nation. I ended up spending the next few years of my life in grad school, working on an MA in History, Cuba being my major field. I returned to Cuba again in the summer of 2003. That's another story. Over the course of the two trips I have seen the island from coast to coast.

While, now my life has taken yet another turn - Cuba, the people there, the sights, smells, sounds and the history have left an indelible mark on my heart and soul.

catching up.....

October was a busy month! My classes are moving along. I finished a rather heavy assignment of writing a genealogical / analytical paper on my family's behavioral and emotional patterns. It was a long project, though fascinating. I am grateful for my parents being open to my questions and inquiries. I am now swamped with a term paper on feminist/cultural theories and psychotherapy. I have a gazillion smaller projects in the works as well. I am looking forward to Christmas break, though will be swamped with prep for my last MA exam in Cuban History - as mentioned before. So, not much of a break.

I am planning to be headed to Ft. Benning, GA a week from today for the SOA protest. I met the group I will be traveling with at a planning dinner. They seem like a nice group, and I am eagerly anticipating the trip and the action. I don't think I posted previously that our department (Institute for Pastoral Studies) is paying 100% of our transportation costs. This was fantastic news! We will be driving, and packed into a couple rental cars.

We have been having some pretty significant struggles with E. A couple nights ago we called a crisis counselor into the house, at the suggestion of her regular counselor. I can't disclose details, because of privacy. But, she will now be receiving in-home therapy/counseling and it is all covered by the IL State/Kid Care program. The crisis worker, Graham, and I decided that in-patient care was not necessary at this time - but they have wonderful care and opportunities for us to utilize. After the gentleman left at about midnight, Graham turned to me and said, "is this for real? that was amazing." And we both were so grateful for the care but also dismayed that it is care like this that the opponents of S-CHIP funding want to cut. E's care may prevent me from the trip to GA - so we are taking that as it comes. She comes first.

I am looking forward to a quiet weekend at home. The last few weekends Graham and I both have had things to attend. So, I plan on getting some reading and writing done. I will also be finishing an afghan I have been working on since September. I finished knitting it yesterday, and will be attaching the panels this weekend. I hope to have it shipped off to my cousin within the next week. It is so lovely - made from very soft Peruvian alpaca wool. I will post a picture of it when I get a chance.

I have started working on the fair isle legwarmers for my friend Sarah, and even went to a yarn shop for pointers. I will be picking those back up this weekend as well.

I have decided not to seek out a clinical internship with the YWCA in Chicago after becoming really disenchanted with their staff. As a volunteer victim advocate, I am really dismayed by their lack of organization and respect. I was also quite frustrated with the attitude of a lot of the women present at the staff in-service last week. The bitter, self-righteousness and lack of empathy for people surrounding the clients was disgusting. It doesn't appear to be a very nurturing environment. The YWCA in St. Louis was another story altogether. I loved working with them and wish I could do my clinical work there. It is that work that brought me to the point I am at today, in school. So, I am wide open as far as internships. We will be doing some site visits within the upcoming months. I am open to diverse ideas and places. So, we will see what comes of it.

Ultrasound on Monday - I have done a pretty good job of keeping my mind distracted and busy. Any news will be posted.

Peace.

if only this could stick

it's long - but just catch the first minute or two.

ouch

After a couple months of persistent pelvic pain, I finally got to a doctor. Much to my dismay, the doctor could not give a diagnosis or any advice as how to relieve the pain. However, I was told that my uterus is enlarged and I have to go back next week for an ultrasound to look for possible tumors.

Needless to say I am feeling a little scared and unsure and hope that a. it isn't cancer and b. whatever it is (if anything) it can be taken care of and leave my reproductive organs in tact.

I had a rough weekend, left alone, with my mind racing, unable to sleep and feeling quite ill. I am not in the best of spirits, but am trying to stay busy. I am feeling a little lonely these days.

Prayers and love appreciated.